Is imitation really flattery?
Intentional imitation vs. natural imitation
For a long time I’ve heard that imitation is the highest form of flattery. There’s a right way to do this which honors the diversity of the people of Church Body. And there’s a wrong way that leaves people vulnerable, angry, or hurt.
When imitation goes wrong
I have a tendency of picking up on people’s mannerisms fairly quickly. It’s those little things that make people uniquely who they are.
Last week, as I was spending some time with songwriters from all parts of the country, I started to pick up on my friend’s mannerism. When she hears something she likes or agrees with she’ll give a short “Mmmm”.
I started to pick up on this and started doing it intentionally. What I thought would be honoring was actually leaving my sister in the Lord vulnerable. She felt like I was making fun of her.
Wow. That changed my perspective on it. I quickly reconciled with her and our friendship was restored.
Letting imitation happen naturally
You’ve probably noticed that when you hang out a group of friends for a long time you’ll pick up on their mannerisms. I think this is a form of imitation that just might be more honoring.
For example, my son, who’s almost 2 years old, is learning a lot through observation. The last time we were in Chicago he started giving my parents a small bow when he greeted them. This is how we greet people with respect in the Korean culture whether it’s an older family member or a stranger.
My parents were so happy about this. They really liked the fact that he was greeting them with a polite bow.
Lesson about imitation
The lesson is quite simple. When we’re trying to absorb and learn the cultures of the people in our church and neighborhood we shouldn’t imitate mannerisms intentionally.
We should be building relationships intentionally and letting someone else’s culture impact/influence our hearts. It’s better for someone to say, “He/She is starting to rub off on you.”
What do you think? Is there a fine line between imitation and flattery? Has this gotten you into trouble with a friend before? How do you do things differently now?
Share your story and your life…
Sincerely,
Peter Park
Blogger/Worship Leader/Speaker
peterpark@redemptionboulevard.com
(800) 453-3284
Are you an introvert who’s cutting yourself off from the body?
The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” And the head cannot say to the feet, “I don’t need you!”
1 Corinthians 12:21
An introvert is part of the Body of Christ
I’ve been realizing more and more that just because I’m an introvert doesn’t mean I am allowed to cut myself off from the Body. I need to be involved with the Church community. It’ll take some planning and work, but it’s totally necessary.
Getting ready to talk to people
Last week I had the tremendous opportunity to get together with over a dozen multicultural worship leaders to write songs for the Church. It was an incredible time.
You had people from various ethnic backgrounds, talents, gifts, personalities, etc.
Bearing that in mind I had to prepare myself to be with my friends. I spent some time being alone and mentally preparing myself not to have too much time. I also woke up early in the morning each day, at about 5 a.m., to spend some time by myself because I knew I it would be the only time I would have to myself.
Working with too many people
During the first day we spent some time getting to know one another, which was important to do. But as we broke off into groups I soon realized I was in the wrong group.
I don’t mean there was anything wrong with the people. There were just too many people there.
People were throwing out song ideas really fast and I just couldn’t process it. By the time I finished internally processing they were off to another part of the song.
It was really hard for me.
A happy medium for an introvert
After lunch, on the first day, I went off to find a room by myself. I pulled out a song that I wrote two months before. It felt a little incomplete, so I wanted to refine it.
That’s when another sister in the Lord showed up, Holly G. She and I worked on the song for a couple of hours. Holly thinks in terms of themes, which helped me get a better feel for the song.
We also looked at Isaiah 6 and she helped me see some of the major themes within the scriptures.
Lesson…
You need to take some time to understand how you’re wired, how you can build relationships intentionally, and continue to be part of the Body of Christ. An introvert is not an island. An introvert is just as important as an extrovert in the Body of Christ.
Do you find yourself cutting people off from your life? What are some ways you can be an introvert and actively build relationships?
Share your story and your life…
Sincerely,
Peter Park
Blogger/Worship Leader/Speaker
peterpark@redemptionboulevard.com
(800) 453-3284