Posts tagged ‘imitation’
Is imitation really flattery?
Intentional imitation vs. natural imitation
For a long time I’ve heard that imitation is the highest form of flattery. There’s a right way to do this which honors the diversity of the people of Church Body. And there’s a wrong way that leaves people vulnerable, angry, or hurt.
When imitation goes wrong
I have a tendency of picking up on people’s mannerisms fairly quickly. It’s those little things that make people uniquely who they are.
Last week, as I was spending some time with songwriters from all parts of the country, I started to pick up on my friend’s mannerism. When she hears something she likes or agrees with she’ll give a short “Mmmm”.
I started to pick up on this and started doing it intentionally. What I thought would be honoring was actually leaving my sister in the Lord vulnerable. She felt like I was making fun of her.
Wow. That changed my perspective on it. I quickly reconciled with her and our friendship was restored.
Letting imitation happen naturally
You’ve probably noticed that when you hang out a group of friends for a long time you’ll pick up on their mannerisms. I think this is a form of imitation that just might be more honoring.
For example, my son, who’s almost 2 years old, is learning a lot through observation. The last time we were in Chicago he started giving my parents a small bow when he greeted them. This is how we greet people with respect in the Korean culture whether it’s an older family member or a stranger.
My parents were so happy about this. They really liked the fact that he was greeting them with a polite bow.
Lesson about imitation
The lesson is quite simple. When we’re trying to absorb and learn the cultures of the people in our church and neighborhood we shouldn’t imitate mannerisms intentionally.
We should be building relationships intentionally and letting someone else’s culture impact/influence our hearts. It’s better for someone to say, “He/She is starting to rub off on you.”
What do you think? Is there a fine line between imitation and flattery? Has this gotten you into trouble with a friend before? How do you do things differently now?
Share your story and your life…
Sincerely,
Peter Park
Blogger/Worship Leader/Speaker
peterpark@redemptionboulevard.com
(800) 453-3284
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